Gem of the Week: Condoms for Kids!

An elementary school in Provincetown, Massachusetts (here we go again with those nutty New Englanders!) has decided the time has come to make condoms available to kids and also to teach kids how to use them.  Young kids; as in first and second graders.

Last week, the Provincetown School Board Committee unanimously adopted the condom distribution policy which will go into effect in the fall.  The only debate, it seems, was whether or not the kids would actually have to ask school officials for the condoms or whether they would simply be handed out along with the pencils, rulers and protractors.  But reason prevailed and it was decided they should ask the school nurse first.  So now seven, six, and even five-year-olds can, upon asking, be given a condom and taught how to use it.  As to whether parents should ever be informed about this: absolutely not!  The wise men and women of the committee directed school leaders not to honor demands from parents who object to their kids receiving condoms from the school. 

Despite criticism, Provincetown School Board Chairman Peter Grosso says there is no set age when sexual activity starts.  And Beth Singer, the school’s superintendent, said she wanted to guarantee younger students get information on how to use condoms because there just is no age limit.  “We’re talking about younger kids,” said Singer. “They have questions they need answered on how to use them, when to use them.”

By this logic, I suppose that if a seven-year-old happens to ask questions on how to safely engage in sado-masochistic sex that these school officials will indulge those requests too.  So next year, the Committee intends to propose that all elementary school kids in Provincetown, Massachusetts be taught the safe and proper way to wear a gimp suit.

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