Gem of the Year: Gray Lady Gone Senile

What used to be a newspaper called the New York Times recently proclaimed that Comedy Central’s Jon Stewart is arguably today’s Edward R. Murrow, the renowned broadcast journalist.

While this may seem remarkable, in related stories the New York Times has made similar comparisons as follows: Rachel Maddow is today’s Walter Cronkite; Adam Sandler is today’s Clark Gable; Rosie O’Donnell is today’s Marilyn Monroe; Nancy Pelosi is today’s Thomas Jefferson; and Paris Hilton is today’s Joan of Arc. Oh, and of course, Barack Hussein Obama is today’s Jesus Christ.

I would add one more to their list: the New York Times is today’s Mad Magazine.

Gem of the Week: Scientists Report Discovery Of “Liberal” Gene

Scientists have reportedly discovered the existence of a “liberal” gene in human beings. 1   It apparently controls a very small but—in liberals—highly active area of the brain known as the hippo-liberalis-jak-assis which is responsible for naïveté, gullibility, impulsiveness, stubbornness, irrational behavior, wasteful spending, the predisposition to be misled by charismatic people, and just all around stupidity.

So finally, we have an explanation for this disease that seems to afflict so many Americans.  And the really good news is that scientists are now working on a cure which they expect to have widely available in all fifty states this November 2^nd. 

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Notes:

Fn. 1:

http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/10/28/researchers-liberal-gene-genetics-politics/

Gem of the Week: Thank You, Gloria.

Thanks to attorney Gloria Allred we now have exposed the deceitful, nefarious, illegal dealings of one very dishonest woman.  And now this woman will have to face the repercussions of her actions.  Through her good works and contacts, Gloria has put the public spotlight on those who would deceive the government about the status of an illegal alien in order to create pecuniary gain for themselves.

Who am I talking about?  California gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman?  No, not at all.  She did nothing wrong, other than let herself be duped by her own housekeeper.  I am talking about the housekeeper herself, Nicky Diaz Santillan, who happens also to be Gloria Allred’s client.  This woman entered the country as an illegal alien.  She obtained false employment documents including a fake social security card and California drivers license.  She deceived an employment agency by presenting this false documentation in order to obtain employment. And she lied to her employer, Meg Whitman, about her status for nine years all the while collecting a $23 hourly wage.

And now Gloria Allred has brought all of this to the attention of the public, including the immigration authorities.  Thank you Gloria for your invaluable service to the nation!  But, I have to admit, placing your own client in legal jeopardy and at risk of deportation sure is a funny way to go about it.  Oh well, I’m sure you know what you’re doing.  After all you are a “super-lawyer.”  By the way, good luck with the California Bar Association!

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Gem of the Week: Condoms for Kids!

An elementary school in Provincetown, Massachusetts (here we go again with those nutty New Englanders!) has decided the time has come to make condoms available to kids and also to teach kids how to use them.  Young kids; as in first and second graders.

Last week, the Provincetown School Board Committee unanimously adopted the condom distribution policy which will go into effect in the fall.  The only debate, it seems, was whether or not the kids would actually have to ask school officials for the condoms or whether they would simply be handed out along with the pencils, rulers and protractors.  But reason prevailed and it was decided they should ask the school nurse first.  So now seven, six, and even five-year-olds can, upon asking, be given a condom and taught how to use it.  As to whether parents should ever be informed about this: absolutely not!  The wise men and women of the committee directed school leaders not to honor demands from parents who object to their kids receiving condoms from the school. 

Despite criticism, Provincetown School Board Chairman Peter Grosso says there is no set age when sexual activity starts.  And Beth Singer, the school’s superintendent, said she wanted to guarantee younger students get information on how to use condoms because there just is no age limit.  “We’re talking about younger kids,” said Singer. “They have questions they need answered on how to use them, when to use them.”

By this logic, I suppose that if a seven-year-old happens to ask questions on how to safely engage in sado-masochistic sex that these school officials will indulge those requests too.  So next year, the Committee intends to propose that all elementary school kids in Provincetown, Massachusetts be taught the safe and proper way to wear a gimp suit.

 For a related post, click here:

https://culturecrusader.wordpress.com/2010/04/16/gem-of-the-week-glen-or-glenda/

Gem of the Week: Brussels Biden

Or Belgian Joe, if you prefer. That’s right. Looks like the VP is a really big fan of the capital of Belgium.  (That’s Brussels for any of you who aren’t in the know.)  Earlier this month, the inimitable Vice President gave a speech before the European Union, which is based in Brussels, and said the following:

“As you probably know, some American politicians and American journalists refer to Washington, D.C. as the ‘capital of the free world,’ but it seems to me that in this great city, which boasts 1,000 years of history and which serves as the capital of Belgium, the home of the European Union, and the headquarters for NATO, this city has its own legitimate claim to that title.” 

So yes, ladies and gentlemen, we present to you that great beacon of liberty, that last bastion of freedom: Brussels!  Home of the original Waffle House.  Now, I like my waffles (and sprouts) just as much as the next fellow, but Brussels? The capital of the free world?  I’ve mentioned Biden’s nuttiness before, but now I’m beginning to think he’s been smoking some of the President’s stash.

Anyway, next month Biden plans to celebrate that great capital of world culture: Pyongyang, North Korea.

Another round of Flemish Red please!

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For a related post on this topic, link to:

https://culturecrusader.wordpress.com/2010/04/12/this-universal-healthcare-thing-is-a-big-fing-deal/

Gem of the Week: Woody the Fascist

 

“It is a fool’s prerogative to utter truths that no one else will speak.” 1

In a recent interview published by a Spanish language newspaper, film director and comedian Woody Allen had this to say about Barack Obama: “I am pleased with Obama. I think he’s brilliant. The Republican Party should get out of his way and stop trying to hurt him… It would be good…if he could be a dictator for a few years because he could do a lot of good things quickly.” 2

Dictator? Really?  Sounds ridiculous, right?  And coming from a nutty—albeit highly accomplished and creative—guy like Woody Allen, it’s to be easily dismissed. Or is it?  Perhaps Woody himself is unaware of just how germane his comment really is. 

First, need we remind ourselves that Obama and his party control the White House and both houses of Congress.  As Commander in Chief, he of course has full control over the military.  And in less than two years, the Obama government:

• controls at least one-sixth of the American economy through the new healthcare law;
• controls a large part of the automotive industry with the bailout and takeover of General Motors;
• controls or exercises daunting power over the insurance and financial industries with the bailout of the banks and AIG;
• controls 96% of the housing market through quasi-government housing finance giants Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac;
• will have unprecedented control over a large part of the energy sector with the passage of “Cap and Trade” legislation;
• will have unprecedented control over news and other media outlets that it doesn’t already have de facto control over (i.e., NBC and MSNBC) with the passage of the “fairness doctrine” or its equivalent.
• will have unprecedented control over the Internet with the passage of so-called “net neutrality” or its equivalent.
• is attempting to infiltrate and exercise control over the nation’s churches through a new faith-based initiative program that merges churches with the EPA.
• is attempting, through the Justice Department, to usurp control over a state’s right to duly enact laws to deal with immigration problems within the state (Arizona);
• is publicly contemplating, through the Justice Department, a modification to the Miranda laws with respect to certain U.S. citizens.

It would seem all President Obama needs now is some kind of national catastrophe or emergency (real or contrived) as justification for enacting his own form of “enabling” law to sweep away any remaining dissent and fully suspend all freedom of speech and civil rights.  So I’d say Woody is just one Reichstag Fire away from getting his wish. 3  But Woody may want to be careful what he wishes for.  His people don’t have a really good history with dictators, don’t cha know. 

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Footnotes:

Fn. 1: Attributed to Neil Gaiman, in Dream Country

Fn. 2: For Woody Allen quote:

http://entertainment.blogs.foxnews.com/2010/05/17/woody-allen-president-obama-dictator/

Fn. 3: For more information on the German Reichstag fire click here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reichstag_fire

Gem of the Week: Wear the American Flag to School and Get Sent Home

Students at a California high school were sent home from school on Wednesday for having the unmitigated brazenness to wear T-shirts sporting the American flag.  The five teens were sitting around a table outside Live Oak High School in Morgan Hill, California, when Assistant Principal Miguel Rodriguez (pronounced, mee – gel / rod – ree- gez) asked them to accompany him to the principal’s office where they were ordered to turn their T-shirts inside-out or be sent home.  You see, Wednesday was Cinco de Mayo day, an annual holiday that is celebrated in another country called Mexico.  But it would seem it also is celebrated with quite a bit of hoopla at this particular California school.  On this day, school officials had enthusiastically encouraged the students to wear Mexican red, white, and green, but deemed the display of Old Glory as “incendiary.”  Hence, the disciplinary action against these students.

You know, I had never really given much thought before to Cinco de Mayo.  But Señor Assistant Principal Rodriguez has inspired me.  From now on, I am going to make the effort to celebrate it every year.  In my own special way.

Incendiary enough for ya?

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For more on good schools gone bad, click here:

https://culturecrusader.wordpress.com/2010/04/16/gem-of-the-week-glen-or-glenda/

https://culturecrusader.wordpress.com/2010/03/06/gem-of-the-week-2/

Gem of the Week: U.N. Elects Iran to Commission on Women’s Rights (Seriously!)

The United Nations, that august body of the world’s great statesmen, has decided in its infinite wisdom to elect Iran, yes, Iran, to its Commission on the Status of Women, a committee charged with the mission of worldwide “gender equality and advancement of women.”

Snapping into action, Iran immediately announced it would be leading the charge on various cutting edge women’s rights issues around the world.  Top of the agenda: henceforth, all public stonings and lashings of immodest women will only be permitted on Tuesdays and Thursdays, with severe beatings to take place on Fridays. 

Next up for the United Nations: North Korea to head the new U.N. Task Force on Human Rights in Emerging Democracies.  Keep up the good work, U.N.!

Gem of the Week: The Right to Disneyworld!

Tourism is now a human right in Europe!  Yep!  Not simply the right to move freely or travel about, but the right, if you are a European, to demand of your government a taxpayer-subsidized vacation to somewhere like, say, Disneyworld!  Euro-Disney, that is.  Wow, Europe must be such a wonderful place!  But where-oh-where do they get all that free money from?  I mean it must grow on trees over there!  Or maybe the Europeans who work at all the amusement parks, hotels, resorts and other vacation spots just work for free.  Not to mention all the folks working on the planes, trains, buses, etc. that are needed to transport everyone who chooses to exercise their new free tourism right.  Oh well, I’m sure they’ve got it all figured out.  Besides, who cares when it’s a free vacation!

With the big debate over here being about whether there is even a right to healthcare, those fancy European Union folks must think we’re just a bunch of heathens.  You can almost hear them in Brussels saying, “Healthcare a right? Oh, mon dieu! Of course that is a right!  We’ve wrapped that one up and given it to our peoples long ago, Messieurs.  Even Hitler and Stalin knew that! What is it with you provincial Americans and your so-called Natural Laws anyway?  No wonder we kicked you out.  Ignorant philistines!”

The Griswolds in Europe

Ah, yes.  It would indeed appear that the wise men and women of Europe have “progressed” to bigger and better things.  The Times Online reports that the European Union has formally declared that tourism is now a human right and that “pensioners, youths and those too poor to afford it should have their travel subsidized by the taxpayer.”  According to EU Commissioner for Enterprise and Industry, Antonio Tajani, “Travelling for tourism today is a right. The way we spend our holidays is a formidable indicator of our quality of life.”  According to Tajani’s spokesman: “Why should someone from the Mediterranean not be able to travel to Edinburgh in summer for a breath of cool, fresh air; why should someone from Edinburgh not be able to travel to Greece in winter?”  1

And why not indeed?  Well, I guess they always have been a few steps ahead of us over there.  I for one will not be completely happy (as is my right) until everyone has a right to a mansion and a yacht and a Maserati Quattroporte and, oh yes, a free lap-dance from that Taiwanese stripper I met the other night.  Now that’s what I call exercising a natural right!

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Fn. 1:  To view the full Times Online article, click here: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article7100943.ece

For a related post on this topic, link to:

https://culturecrusader.wordpress.com/2010/03/20/why-you-don%e2%80%99t-have-a-right-to-healthcare/

Gem of the Week: Glen or Glenda?

This week, the Maine Human Rights Commission moved to ban gender specific bathrooms, locker rooms and sports teams in all public schools and even some private schools.  That’s right.  The girls’ room ain’t just for little girls anymore!  Nor is the boys’ room only for little boys.  Nor are locker rooms, showers, etc. That is, if the Maine Human Rights Commission gets its way.  (Just as an aside, whenever I see the words “Human Rights” linked with “Commission” I get very nervous.)

Apparently, this issue really got going last year when the Commission ruled that, under the Maine Human Rights Act, a school had discriminated against a twelve-year-old boy who identified himself as a girl (they call it self-identifying), by denying him access to the girls’ bathroom.  Now the Commission is looking to issue guidelines on how schools—including even pre-school and nursery schools—should adjust themselves in order to deal with this issue.  Maine would be the first state to implement such guidelines.  Not surprisingly, the Commission has drawn fire for this decision and has recently been compelled to back-pedal a bit, but the issue is not entirely a dead letter; it has merely been postponed. 

I’m just curious, does a twelve year old have the mental and emotional (to say nothing of legal) capacity to sort out all the factors that go into whether he/she is a boy/girl?  I’ve heard of adults making the transgender switch only to realize later on that they may have been a little too hasty (I think it’s called transgender regret).  So I wonder about the parents of a mixed up child being so positively certain that their kid is this or that other gender. Something to think about and I wonder if the Commission did think about it.  Also, while I am no doctor or school guidance counselor, I do know what it was like to be a kid in public school, and the Commission’s decision has “really bad idea” written all over it.

Oh well, just another example of progressives meddling with the culture.  Even worse: Maine progressives meddling with the culture.  If the Maine Human Rights Commission ever succeeds in pushing through its radical-progressive agenda, I sincerely hope that the old aphorism, “as Maine goes, so goes the nation,” proves to be no more than a fairy tale.