Democratic Voters: The Case for Literacy Tests

Alvin Greene, Democrat for United States Senate

A couple weeks ago, South Carolina Democratic primary voters elected a man by the name of Alvin Greene as their candidate to represent the Democratic Party for the general senatorial election in the fall.  But only after beating former state representative and judge, Vic Rawl, with 60 percent of the vote no less, did anyone notice that Mr. Greene has no job, no home, no political experience, no campaign headquarters, no campaign manager, and hadn’t even run much of a campaign.  It is also not entirely clear if he even knows who he will be running against in the general  election.  (Pssst!  Hey Alvin, it’s Republican Senator Jim DeMint!)  So he also might be a little, shall we say, mentally challenged.  But he does have a felony arrest (for allegedly showing pornography to a minor) and at least enough money to afford the $10,000 filing fee to run for the Senate.  So to be fair, he’s got that going for him. 

When all these facts came to light, Democratic operatives like David Axelrod and MSNBC’s Chris Matthews immediately concluded it must be a Republican dirty trick.  I mean, Democrats wouldn’t be soooo stupid as to actually vote for someone like this, would they?  Well, the more likely explanation, experts agree, is that they indeed are.  You see, Mr. Greene’s name sounds a lot like the legendary 1970s soul singer, Al Green.  You know, the guy who sang such hit singles as “You Oughta Be With Me,” and “Love and Happiness.”  And the sad but plausible explanation is that Democratic voters actually thought they were voting for this guy.

Al Green

Now, I’m all for the Democratic Party monumentally screwing up their own electoral chances, but ya really gotta wonder about those registered Democratic voters of theirs.  I mean, what kind of incredible idiots would elect for high office a young, African-American man, from clear out of nowhere, with no qualifications, no executive experience, questionable origins, suspect funding, and … oh, wait a minute.  Forget it.

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2 Responses to “Democratic Voters: The Case for Literacy Tests”

  1. culturecrusader Says:

    Democratic Voters: The Case for Literacy Tests – Part 2

  2. culturecrusader Says:

    Democratic Voters: The Case for Literacy Tests – Part 3

    (The scary thing is that this is actually one of the better ideas I’ve heard coming from the Democrats.)

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